Surviving a Horror Movie pt. 1
* Always make sure that your car has a fresh battery and a full tank of gas so it will start immediately in times of crisis.
* When it appears that you have killed the monster, never check to see if it's really dead.
* If appliances start operating by themselves, MOVE OUT.
* If you find that your house was built upon or near a cemetery, was once a church that was used for black masses, had previous inhabitants who went mad or committed suicide or died in some horrible fashion, or had inhabitants who performed necrophilia or satanic practices, move away immediately.
* Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke. Don't mumble to yourself, either - if you can't read silently, you have no business with such
a thing anyway.
* Do not search the basement, especially if the power has just gone out.
* As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that open portals to Hell.
* When you're searching a house because you think there's something dangerous there, for God's sake turn the lights on!
* If your companions suddenly begin to exhibit uncharacteristic behavior such as hissing, fascination for blood, glowing eyes, increasing hairiness, and so on, get away from them as soon as possible!
* If your car runs out of gas at night, DO NOT go to the nearest deserted-looking house to phone for help. If you think that is strange because you thought you had half a tank, shoot yourself instead. You are going to die anyway, and most likely be eaten.
by Roosevelt Samarie L.
Tags: Surviving A Horror Movie Staying Alive
